Meltdown

I have read a lot abt hormones and pregnancy and meltdowns but I never thought much of it. I mean… come on, I have been through seven rounds of injecting hormones into my body over the last 4 years and I have survived that. Pregnancy hormones…. pffft… should be a piece of cake. Or so I thought!

I had my first meltdown an hour ago. I mean seriously…. uncontrollable tears running down my cheeks for 10 straight minutes! God! And I was at work. Oh the kicker, all the while (as the tears are pouring), I KNEW that I was crying over something absolutely stupid. I KNEW that I needed to stop and get over it. I KNEW that it was the stupid hormones. But there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Oh… who caused it you ask? My dear wonderful jerk-ass husband. I asked him to meet me at the cafe for a snack (he was at my work place). He agreed. It took me a little while (maybe 5 mins longer than a non-pregnant fast walker) to waddle my way to the cafe as I had to stop on the way for a pee-break. As I am peeing, my cell phone rings. I ignore. (BTW, I can’t stand it when people talk in bathroom stalls… I think its just gross!) As I leave the restroom, he calls again. I take it and he was like “I am waiting in the cafe and you are not here. Where are you? You ask me to come and you are not here. I have work to do so I am going back upstairs.” I was like “I had to stop to pee, but OK”. As I head to the cafe, I see him, he turns around to accompany me, and I ask him to continue on if he has work. He leaves. I get my food. Come back to my cube. And all hell breaks lose! Wow!

On any other day, I would have been like… “You idiot, I am carrying two human beings, can’t walk straight, and have to pee every 3 hours, so cut me some freaking slack”. But not today. And in all reality, it WAS NOT a big deal at all!! He was probably tensed abt some deadlines/meetings/whatever. But it was something that was completely out of my control.

Crying uncontrollably for something stupid… definitely a first for me. Oh, I wonder how many more such episodes are waiting for me. Fun.